There comes a point in time when having children is the top priority for many individuals and couples. When having a child becomes this important, infertility can easily cause tension and contention in a relationship. Couples often struggle to agree on what to do.
After 1-2 years of trying with no success, one partner might begin to panic, and be discouraged if his or her partner doesn’t share the same concern. Some people find it easier to be patient, or fail to believe that infertility can be a reality in their lives.
Partners should be supportive of one another, and seek to understand the other’s perspective. As is often the case, one partner may have a stronger desire for children than the other. Or, one partner may tend to hide that desire, much to the dismay of the partner. An environment of understanding and compassion is vital for maintaining a healthy relationship when struggling with infertility.
If you’re struggling to get pregnant, both members of a marriage or partnership should learn about the causes of infertility, and about infertility diagnostic tests. Being informed leads to the best decisions and discussions.
Dealing With Frustration
Contention in a relationship over fertility problems may be sparked after several fertility treatments have already been tried. A woman who has endured many failed treatments may be frustrated and exhausted. If miscarriage has happened, this can be incredibly taxing. Spouses must be mindful of this strain before pushing for more fertility treatment.
Cost is another possible sources of disagreement. It may be an easy decision for one partner to make a financial sacrifice, while it may be harder for the other.
How to Deal With Disagreement
Here are a few keys to keeping your relationship strong in the face of disagreement over fertility treatment.
- Make an effort to understand your partner’s perspective. Listen, be attentive, and be aware.
- Educate yourself on fertility, and seek a consultation.
- Be willing to make compromises when it comes to testing and treatments.
Being positive can also be essential to maintaining a healthy relationship. If your partner’s hopes and dreams rest heavily on parenthood, infertility can be devastating. Remain positive, even when the outcome isn’t certain. This can be a great opportunity to be a supportive partner, and develop stronger bonds that will help in future trials.